People say funny things when they’re in and out of love. These are the best love quotes that explain love, hand you some cheesy pickup lines, and tell you all you need to know about men and women. How do you tell someone you’re in love? What happens in a relationship? Are you unlucky in the matters of the heart?
Did you know that the brain is the most outstanding organ? It works 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, and from birth until you… fall in love.
Love quotes explain love
If you try to explain to someone what love is, there is just no easy answer. That’s why it is best to let the quotes do the explaining.
“Love is like a fart. If you have to force it, it’s probably sh*t.”
“Love is a weird thing. Like you just pick a human and you’re like, yes, I like this one… I’ll let this one ruin my life forever.”
“Love is… Not having to hold your farts in anymore.”
“What is love? Love is the 7th sense that destroys all the 6 senses, and makes the person believe non-sense.”
“I enjoy long romantic walks to the fridge.”
Men and women, more often than not, express their love a little different from each other. Let some love quotes explain the differences between the gender, and what each expects from the other.
Males vs females
“Girls express their feelings via tears. Boys express their feelings via beers.”
“Men look at a woman’s behind and go ‘Wow! What an a**!’ Women look at a man’s face and think the same.”
“You know what’s sexier than a bad boy? A grown a** man with his sh*t together.”
“Men are like snowstorms. You never know when he’s coming, how many inches you’ll get, or how long he will last.”
“If a woman is upset, hold her and tell her how beautiful she is. If she starts to growl, retreat to a safe distance and throw chocolate at her.”
“Men go shopping to buy what they want… Women go shopping to find out what they want.”
“Men or shoes? I choose shoes. They last longer.”
“Women might be able to fake orgasms, but men can fake a whole relationship.”
Now that you know what love is, and you also gained a fairly good understanding about the difference of the sexes, you are ready to start dating. Keyword here is START. How does one approach another person with a good pick-up line that might lead to a first date? Maybe you’re already in love and now you want the other person to know how you feel. It’s just so hard to find the right words. No worries. Love quotes to the rescue!
Cheesy pick-up lines and love confessions
“I love you with all my boobs. I would say heart, but my boobs are bigger.”
“You make my dopamine levels go all silly.”
“I love you. You annoy me more than I ever thought possible. But I want to spend every irritating minute with you.”
“Somewhere between all our laughs, long talks, stupid little fights, and all our lame jokes… I fell in love.”
“I love you like a fat kid loves cake.”
“I want to grow so old with you that people can’t tell our genders apart.”
“You know what would look good on you? Me!”
“You steam up my glasses so hard.”
“I want to be the reason you look down at your phone and smile… And then walk into a pole… ;)”
“I’d shave my legs for you.”
“I lost my teddy. Will you sleep with me?”
“I think you suffer from a lack of vitamin me.”
Pheww. You made it and you are ready to tie the knot. But let’s not get into a rush. I know, I know. The two of you love each other dearly, and you want to spend the rest of your life together. Through good times and bad times. Until either death or divorce takes you apart. Whichever comes first.
But before you pop the question, have a seat and truly understand what marriage is all about.
Love quotes about the married life
“Marriage is a fairy tale… just in reverse. You start out at a ball in a beautiful gown, and end up spending all day cleaning up after little people.”
“Never laugh at your wife’s choices. You are one of them.”
“That moment when you have to leave the clothes you just bought in the trunk of the car, because your husband is home.”
“Been married 20 years, but I still carry my wife’s picture in my wallet. Whenever I face difficulties in life, I take out my wallet and stare at her picture. And it comforts me knowing that… if I survived being married to this psycho, I can survive anything.”
“What’s a Queen without her King? Well, historically speaking, more powerful.”
“Marriage: Let’s you annoy one special person for the rest of your life.”
“If you ever feel sad. Watch your marriage video in reverse. Wife will remove her ring, leave your car and will return to her home.”
Well. Not everything good will last forever, and sometimes love wears off and relationships come to an end. There are probably some quotes for those situations, too. Let’s see.
After the love has died
“Whenever your ex says: ‘You’ll never find anyone like me,’ reply with: ‘That’s the point.”
“I tripped and fell into some feelings. I’m okay now. I brushed that sh*t off.”
“Dear Heart, Please stop getting involved in everything. Your job is to pump blood. That’s it! Sincerely, Me.”
“Taking your ex back is like trying to put poop back into your butt.”
“Whoever told me to follow my heart is going to get shanked. Follow your brain. Your heart is an idiot.”
“Facebook should have a limit on how many times you can change your relationship status. After 3 it should default to ‘unstable’.”
Now, that you’re single again, we’ll finish up with some fitting love quotes for that. And don’t be discouraged. A new love might be just around the corner. And if you need some motivation to pick yourself back up, there are also funny motivational quotes for that.
Unlike other sites I don’t overload you with ads, force you to turn off ad-blocks or buy into monthly subscriptions.
But, I do need some motivation to keep doing endless research and present you the fruits of my labor that won’t just provide you with a broad spectrum of entertaining information, but is also educational in many cases. Would you buy me a cup of coffee or two to keep me going?
The joy of being single
“Fine. Whatever, I’ll just date myself.”
“My boyfriend is so Handsome, looking all Invisible and sh*t.”
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